noam. a traitor is everyone who does not agree with me.

a traitor is everyone who does not agree with me
noam & jonathan

As much as I disliked my own brother, I miss him more than ever when I realize I'm stuck with Noam as a replacement. No matter what, you'll always end up with annoying people in your life and, this time, this parasite comes from the fact Beatriz acts like my mom and brought up another son. At the beginning, I didn't have a lot of issues with him. He lived his life, I lived mine. Nothing to really worry about and the only thing forcing us to smile at each other - and act polite enough - was the constant presence of Bea. Sadly, she ran away to help another clan, leaving us. Obviously, that little shit didn't wait to follow her like a stupid dog. If I can see her point of making such a betrayal and somehow accepts it, I can't label Noam as anything else than a traitor. I don't feel any obligations forcing me to be neutral around him anymore, not even as I stare at his back in the middle of the jungle after making plenty of noises. He hunts. I know it and he knows I'm aware of his skills, which makes it one hundred percent more fun. The possibility that I just screw up his chance to get his hands on some meat is enough to rejoice me as I step closer, not a tiny bit stressed by the fact he's armed. " Lovely day to meet a traitor. " I step a little closer as I cross my arms over my chest, staring at him with the most sarcastic smile I can put on. " Wouldn't lie I'm quite surprised you can manage to breathe without mom next to you, Tching Tchang. " It's much more pleasant to mock people when they are basically little walking time bomb needing a simple spark to explode. Maybe it's exactly what I want: to make him angry enough to be given the opportunity to fight him without any witnesses. Quite ironic for me to be unable to stand sheep like him when I'm also one in my own way.

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CODES © LITTLE WOLF.

#QuandTuRéalisesQueTonAnglaisÉcritEstPasSiBonQueÇa

A TRAITOR IS EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT AGREE WITH ME


noam & jonathan

I am hungry. These are probably the few words you can hear coming out of my mouth constantly. It doesn’t matter if I’m in a high or in a down. It’s like my stomach is something else, another person entirely with its own consciousness. There’s nothing I can do to shut it up, except give it what it wants, mostly meat. And that is the only reason I became a hunter on this island. I need to eat, I wanna eat tasty, not some fruits or veggies, and so, I had no choice but to get it myself. Thankfully, my time in the army and the marines taught me a lot of things. I can walk without making much sounds, I am pretty agile, I can shoot, and I can fight. That last one, I learned it early, but let’s just say it’s a whole other thing to know how to fight and to just fight. Then I met with the pretty amazons and they gave me a whole other set of skills before I left. I now know a bit about the animals living around here, a bit about the plants, and a lot about tracking. They also taught me archery, which is a lot more useful when trying to hunt. So here I was in the jungle, my bow in my hands trying to kill that deer when a dumb idiot came in making so much noise it ran away. I lower the bow and arrow while I breathe out trying to not get angry. I recognize the stupid voice immediately, and I know it was intentional. « What do you want ass… Jonathan. » I have to catch my tongue before I let out any insults. I turn around to see his smug face and I really want to drive my fist in it. We’ve never liked each other. He was a suicidal, idiot, future psychopath. I could never understand why Beatriz decided to care for him, but as a result I was stuck with having to interact with this dumbass. And he likes it. He’s such a masochist that he likes getting on my nerves and he does it well. So well I’ll probably lose it again and bash his head in. And it’ll probably feel really good, and it would be for the best, for everyone. But I can’t really do that to Bea, or Matéo, so I have no other choice than to try to contain my anger. But let’s be honest here, I tried all my life and I never could. I tighten my jaw. It’s not the first time he’s used racist insults on me, so it’s pretty tame compared to what I know he’s capable of. « Surprised you’re not dead yet without mom to stop you from being the stupid shithead you are. » My voice is low and menacing. I’m pretty sure he can hear or feel all the strength I’m using to stop myself to lunge at him. If he continues to play with my nerves, I won’t be able to control myself and that might be what he wants. I’m pretty sure that is also what I want. I’ve dreamed of hitting him since the first time we met, so maybe this is the moment we’ve both been waiting for.

a traitor is everyone who does not agree with me
noam & jonathan

It's cute how he tries so hard to keep his composure, restraining himself to fall into insults so quickly despite the fact I can hear in his tone how much Noam wants to. He will snap sooner or later, I have no worries about this. The neutral relationship between us didn't last for long, breaking officially into pure hate at this right moment where I look at him with a cocky grin. Our Island Parents wouldn't be proud of us right now, but we both probably don't give a shit about what other may think. I despise him from the bottom of my heart for absolutely no reason, I admit it, I just can't get over the stupid little detail that he's alive. He thinks he's better since he was in the army and the marines, but the amount of fuck I give is close to none. Down here, it doesn't matter. He learned to fight, I learned to survive and find a way to always get what I want in the end. His comeback lacks creativity since he only used the same pattern I just did to annoy him. " That's all you can do? As far as I know, I'm not the one who followed her like a scared cub. I can survive on my own without mom constantly watching over me. " I appreciate Beatriz protection, but I certainly don't need her to be in a three meters perimeter to feel safe from danger. Noam wants to punch me as much as I want him to, just so I can get a pretext to get down in a real fight with his marine ass. Winning or losing doesn't make a difference for me since I'm able to find victory even in defeat. I step closer, close enough to almost make my nose touches his so I can speak slowly in an almost whispering voice. " If you hurt me, how are you gonna explain it to her? You'll admit that you're not strong enough to control yourself? " The grin on my lips stays firmly on my features, enjoying the situation. Noam is trying so hard to keep his composure while I'm searching for a way to cross his limit, to reach his breaking point. I want an argument to lower him down in front of Beatriz, to make him look like a weak person driven by his mental illness. " Go on, hit me. Show us how unstable and unworthy of Beatriz's attention you are. " He'll snap. And when it happens, I will probably too because I know that I'm not any better than him, just a little bit more stable since I don't suffer from bipolarity like this crazy yellow fuck boy. I don't care about getting bruises, scars or broken bones: everything would simply prove my point.

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CODES © LITTLE WOLF.

A TRAITOR IS EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT AGREE WITH ME


noam & jonathan

A scared cub? I guess that is how you can see it, if you’re blind and completely stupid that is. But again, how could he know any better. You can’t expect anything intelligent coming from that dumber than a goldfish white thrash. Still, my blood is boiling in my veins, and I am tempted to put an arrow straight through his chest. My hand tightens around the bow and I have to drop it to the floor out of fear that I might break it. It was a gift and I don’t know if I could ever forgive me if I did break it out of anger. Moreover, finding another bow that good would be a pain in the ass, and in all honesty, if I was to hit Jonathan, and we both knew it was a question of minutes, even seconds, I wanted to feel it in my hand. I’d been wanting to hit him for so long, it wouldn’t feel right. I get one step closer to him. « You know nothing. » Not my reasons for following her, not my reasons for being here. He knew nothing and yet acted like he knew everything, when in fact, he was too busy getting walked around by his psycho friend. If I was a scared cub and a sheep, I wondered how he saw himself since he was way more similar to those two than I was. He come closer, so close I can feel and smell his fetid breath on my face. The corner of my mouth get lifter up in a menacing smile. When I said he knew nothing, I was not kidding, at all. « I’ve never said I can control it. On the contrary, I’ve said it times and times again. I. Can’t. Control. It. » I say the last few words deliberately slow so he can understand what I’m saying. Beatriz knows it more than anyone else. She also knows how I hate myself every time I lose control. This time however, I don’t think I’ll regret it. Not even one ounce of guilt. He literally asked for it, how could I not give him what he wanted so badly? « You son of a bitch. » And I don’t mean Bea one second. I’m talking about the crazy bitch who gave birth to such a piece of shit. It’s so bad I almost ask myself what hole he came crawling out of. And then I lift my hand and it connect with his jaw with a very satisfying crunch. I can feel the pain of my bones hitting his, but more than the pain, is the rush of adrenaline and the satisfaction of giving in to my desire. « Like you’re worthy of her. » A short laugh, sarcastic and hard leaves my lips as I look at the puny goblin with disgust and hate.

a traitor is everyone who does not agree with me
noam & jonathan

Of course, Noam will try to turn the tables around by making the assumption I'm the ignorant one among us. That I am the one who knows nothing about many things in life, which can be often true, but I do know few skills about surviving in a land where everything can happen and will happen. Being taller, a former marine and using a low voice isn't going to intimidate me, not even a single bit. I have seen worse by simply living with Aiden. All the bullshit that can pass through Noam's stupid small brain can't leave any strain on my precious self-esteem. I'm better than him, for that I'm sure. I may not be the best person on this island, but I'm damn more valuable than this piece of trash made in China. " No self-control, mh. No surprise you're such a needy child then. What are you gonna do when Bea stops caring about your useless carcass? " There's no need in Noam. I can be an only child. Beatriz is too good for this broken fucktard. The new insult amuses me. Is it all it is going to take? The straight hit to my jaw is the answer I waited for, feeling the pain trickles my nerves, but that's exactly what I wanted. I smile back at him, a smirk mocking every fiber composing Noam's body. The space created between us allows the tips of my fingers to reach for my skin, massaging the sore spot along my jawline before risking a quick move by elbowing him in the sternum. " You can do better than a bruise. Give me something more. " I punctuate my words by gripping his shirt with both hands, successfully ramming his back into the nearest tree trunk and holding him there for as long as I can. I can't win in a fistfight with a trained soldier, but I sure as hell can fight back. I could take the easy way by stabbing him with my hidden knife, except it would make it much less interesting. I want him to get mad angry, to give me a real reason to hate him. I got ride of my own siblings by watching one die for days and drowning the second one, there's nothing stopping me from irradiating a false brother. I'm no brother to a weak Asian who looks like he could get a role in the porn industry as a twink.

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CODES © LITTLE WOLF.

A TRAITOR IS EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT AGREE WITH ME


noam & jonathan

Nothing good ever comes from hanging out with thrash. If he used to be tolerable, he definitely grew more and more bouchebag-y. Now there was only one word to describe him: thrash. He was nothing more than a masochistic piece of shit who acted like the world should be thankful for his presence, a parasite without whom the world would be a better place. The logical and intelligent part of me was asking why he would pick a fight like that when he was definitely gonna lose, or why we hated each other so much. The part of me that was in control, aka the me full of rage and completely sick, was telling it to shut the fuck up, and it did. « She wouldn’t do that. She doesn’t throw people aside as easily as you do. » Yeah, I heard what happened when she came to see him. How he completely discarded her, calling her a traitor when she never wanted to abandon anyone. Such a selfish jerk could never understand what was going in her beautiful mind. My fist hits his jaw and he retaliate pretty fast. His elbow makes contact with my sternum and the pain is more than I expected from such a fly, but it is far from enough to do any damage. He pushes me back against a tree knocking the air out of my chest for a few seconds. « and I’m the sick bastard. » A small laugh leaves my lips as I push his hands aside. More? He wants more? Then I’ll give him more. My body is craving the idea of bashing his head in, but there’s still a logical part of me that knows I shouldn’t kill him even if I really want to. I won’t kill him, but I sure as hell can make it hurt, a lot. I lift one of my foot to kick him in the chest, using the tree behind me to gather as much strength as possible. I watch him fly with a satisfied grin before walking toward him. I put my foot on top of his hand, putting enough strength for it to hurt, but not enough to break anything. « You sure you want more? » Whatever he says, I’m not gonna stop when we just began to have some fun. Anyway, I don’t think he’s gonna change his mind either, I can see it in his crazy eyes.

a traitor is everyone who does not agree with me
noam & jonathan

I grit my teeth, glaring at him as I know him well enough to be aware he's talking about how I pushed Beatriz aside when she tried talking to me about her departure from the clan. " I still love her, no matter what. " Who does he think he is? She made a choice and I made mine by staying with my friends, but him? All he did is taking the coward way out without using any brain cells and went with mom's decision. I may be following Aiden's orders most of the time, but there's nothing similar between my and this cum basket. Despite the pain running along my jaw, I have no problem elbowing him and pinning his back against a tree as a small revenge. The laugh following his words is enough for my short patience to snap to the point of no return. While he discards my hands, I spit in his face unceremoniously. " You're forever the sick bastard. You should have stayed in your damn country. " I'm asking for more. A simple bruise isn't enough and I can definitely handle greater pain than this. The kick is quick, forcing the air out of my lungs as I fall down on the ground and the impact mostly hit my shoulder, almost wondering instantly if something broke - I guess not, otherwise, the pain would be stronger. The same shoulder connected to the hand Noam steps on. " As hell I'm sure. " I groan from both the pain and the anger boiling slowly in my veins. My free hand crawls on the jungle ground, searching for a rock easily found and I put as much strength as possible into smashing his patella with it. Using these few seconds of liberty, I roll away from Noam and get back on my feet without the help of my bad arm. I let go of the rock, staring at the empty headed twat few steps away from me and wonder for a second if I could manage to stab him well enough to put his life in danger. Probably not. I ain't trained like he is, but I can get over the crippling pain in my shoulder long enough to act. I exhale through my nose before sprinting toward Noam and tackling him on the ground under my weight. My next reflex is to bring my fingers to his throat, pressing around his windpipe.

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CODES © LITTLE WOLF.

A TRAITOR IS EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT AGREE WITH ME


noam & jonathan

Yeah right. He loves her. What’s the point if he’s gonna push her away and hurt her feelings. He was such an egotistic piece of shit, too self-centered to even think of someone else’s feelings. I followed her yes, but she wasn’t the only reason. I had my own reasons to do what I did. He never knew I had a family, a sister who got lost in the first plane crash. All of that to say he knew nothing, and it was simplistic to think that he only had one reason to go. We stop talking for a moment, the time needed for a few blow to be exchanged. I am the one with the advantage in this fight, but I don’t completely use it. It’s not as fun to use my knowledge against him. I instead fight like I used to before I entered the marines. He spits in my face and it is totally gross. My mind snap and I use all my strength to hit him in the chest. I pass a hand on my face to remove the spit while I get closer and closer to his laying form. My foot gets on his hand and I push. I hear some crunch and I debate whether I should press harder or not. I don’t have the time to get to an answer that I feel an excruciating pain in my right knee. I can’t put any weight on that foot for now. I’m pretty sure I can still beat his tiny ass. We’re separated by a few feet and we look at each other like two cowboys before a showdown. Than he charges toward me. I can’t move fast enough with just one leg so I just receive his blow. My back hurts the floor with a loud thump, and I stare at him as he puts his fingers around my throat. He starts pressing, stopping the flow of the air to my lungs. I lift one arm to hit him in the elbow, bending it on the opposite side. He did it to my knee, why would I stop myself from doing it to him. As he loses his strength in his arm, I push his head hard on the side, moving him out of over me. If he hits his head on the cold floor, then it is even better. I lift myself just high enough so I can sit on his chest, pinning him down on the floor. And then I hit him in the face. Once. And then twice.

a traitor is everyone who does not agree with me
noam & jonathan

The adrenaline rushing through my veins lowers the twinge in my shoulder, enough for me to tackle him football-style and make a way for my fingers around his throat. I could kill him. I definitely want to, by now. Just like my sister, I could easily dispose of the body somewhere in the jungle - or even repeat the 'body into the ocean' thing - and pull out the innocent act. No one would be able to know since there are no witnesses in the area - or I think so. The idea tugs the corners of my lips into a smile, pressing my hands tighter over the delicate skin, right before the low 'crunch' followed by the vivid pain crippling my arm quickly decreases my force. A groan escapes my mouth, unable to pursue the strangulation with only five fingers and I'm pushed away by Noam, ending up on my back with him over me. A quick glance at my arm confirms he hit me in the elbow and it twists in an odd way, explaining the horrible sensation jolting my nerves. I grit my teeth, hissing through them as I try to get over the pain, but I can't and when he starts punching my face that's the last straw that breaks the camel's back. My good arm moves, allowing my hand to search for the knife I keep with me and with one quick move I plunge the blade into the flesh right above his hip, shoving him away from me at the same time so I can free myself from his dirty fat ass sitting on my chest. I pull out the weapon, keeping it in my possession as I swipe under my nose with my wrist. A weird numbness in the area clenches my jaw by reflex and I notice the blood staining my skin. The shithead probably broke my nose and he will pay for it. I don't care how bad I will look afterward: I want him dead. As I jump him, I scream from both anger and the excruciating feeling in my elbow and try to stab him again by aiming for his lungs. Unfortunately, he manages to dodge and the blade sinks into the ground where I leave it. I close my hand into a fist, putting all my strength into punching at the level of his eyes as many times as I can. I don't care anymore.

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CODES © LITTLE WOLF.

a traitor is everyone who does not agree with me

noam && jonathan && beatriz

« For fuck's sake, what the fuck are you doing ? » For those of you who did not get it, I am angry, quite mad I dare say. In my defence, I wasn't expecting to find both of my sons fighting each other when I went into the jungle and I am shocked by my discovery. Oh, I knew that they didn't care much for each other, I'm not that stupid, but I admit that I was hoping for better behaviour on their part. So I am mad and I am clearly showing it. « Both of you, stop it. Now. » I also know I am not exactly imposing, but for their sakes, I hope that they know not to push my buttons. I still am a marine, I could kick both of their asses if I wanted to. And believe me you don't want to go toe to toe with an angry mom, I must be taking after my own mother. Coming closer, I take the bloody knife, I don't want one of them to try one last time. Then I go between them, forcing them to stand back.
At least now, I can understand the noises - more like screams - I heard while I was going further in the jungle. I can also say that I was right when I thought something was off when Noam didn't came back from hunting. My motherly instinct was right on point, not that it really mattered now. I lay my eyes on them both, one after the other. They're in bad shape - and I think that it's putting it mildly : Noam had been stabbed and I can see that his knee is hurt ; Jonathan will probably have bruises, his elbow is in an awful position and that’s not even mentioning his nose which is probably broken. « Hijos Míos. What am I going to do with you two ? » I am pretty disappointed by their behaviour, even though the words don’t cross my lips. Anyways it’s not the time to think about how horrible their behaviour is - at least I’m not the one who raised them. Since Noam has been stabbed, I decide to take care of him first even though I know that he can take care of himself. « Calm down and put pressure on your stab wound. » I’m no doctor, but I have some experience in first aid and that’s the first thing to do. Also, I need him to calm down, because I know what he can do and how he tends to be when pushed to a certain limit. However I also know - or knew since I’m not that sure considering what I’m seeing. Anyways, turning towards Jonathan, I go on : « You’ll have to go to the infirmary, both of you. » They don’t exactly have a choice, they screwed up and I don’t intend to let them go that easily. At least I’m pretty sure that Edan will take care of their wounds, I just need to get them to the infirmary. « Jonathan you’ll help him walk ‘till we get there. And I don’t want a single protest from either one of you. » I still can’t understand why they did this. And so I intend to talk to them when they’re in a better shape.

A TRAITOR IS EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT AGREE WITH ME


noam & jonathan

The sight of his arm bending at an odd angle fills me with satisfaction as I give him more like he wanted. I am filled with hatred right now, and it is a pretty impressive thing to get me that riled up. Usually I stop avec a few punches, the anger subsiding as fast as it appears. But I’m not ready to stop, not even close. If I had to give a hate-o-meter, I would still be around 80%. My leg hurts like hell and it only gives me more power to make him regret it. I hit him in the face and it feels so good to erase that smug smile out of his face. I’m getting ready for a third hit when I feel the blade rips through my skin. The pain makes me groan and he takes the advantage to push me aside. I don’t know what hurts more, feeling the knife enter my flesh or feeling it leaves. I fall on the hard ground and I don’t have to look to know I’m bleeding through my shirt, staining everything around me in a dark red. Dang that hurts. I’m not quite sure how I’m supposed to get up now. My busted knee makes it hard to even move, but I know that if I don’t do anything, I’m no better than dead. I hear him yell before I actually knows what he’s doing, but it’s enough for me to roll out of the way. His blade sinks in the ground and he turns around like a mad dog to come at me with his bare hands. He’s small, he’s fast, but not enough. I evade his first hit and bearing the incredible pain in my knee, forces myself up while picking a rock on the floor to block the second one. I’m getting ready to hit him in the head with this same rock when a voice I know very well intervene. My hand is still high up, ready to give a last blow to the piece of shit. I want to end what I started so bad. My hand starts shaking as I struggle with my anger and my own will. She repeats herself and I know better than to push her to the limit. I finally win over myself and drop the rock. My breath is ragged as I fall back against a tree. I lift my t-shirt enough to look at the knife wound. The blood is going everywhere, it’s almost impossible to find the point of impact with this bloody mess. Every breathe I take sends shiver down my spine, and I feel like my knee might give up anytime. I slightly nod when Bea tells me to put pressure on the wound and I do, repressing the groan I feel coming up. I still want to punch his face in, but I can control it this time. It is not so much pure hatred as it is annoyance now. Infirmary uh. I see no problem with that. I’m actually pretty sure I’ll need stitches to close that wound. However, I was not expecting the end. My eyes darts from her to him, and then back to her before I refuse. « You can’t be serious mom! » How could she even order that when she knew we were fighting to the death a few minutes earlier. I let’s be honest, even if I was able to control myself, I would try to rip his head off if he came any closer. He went over the line by stabbing me and I would never, ever, trust him again.

a traitor is everyone who does not agree with me
noam & jonathan

I can picture him as my third kill on the island so easily, the idea convincing me to try for another stab and I miss it by a matter of a fraction of seconds. The desire to see Noam dead is what drives me into this fighting madness, nearly stopped by a familiar voice. At this point, the blood pumping in my veins echoes inside my ears and I glare down at him with my good hand gripping his shirt. The voice speaks again, stopping me before I can lift his chest up and smash him against the ground again. With the adrenaline slowly washing away, my body aches as I step up and away from this Asian idiot and I lift my gaze toward Beatriz, not even noticing I am angrily staring at her. My elbow is killing me, but I try to tone it down and keep it for me, only betrayed by the wince tensing my soft features. She speaks again, my eyes automatically darting toward the traitor as my healthy arm moves to lift my injured side a bit. I hiss, followed by a frustrated sigh seeing her take care of Noam first. As Hell I'm going to the infirmary. I don't say it out loud, but my piercing gaze speaks for myself. I'm quite happy about the fact we both share the same opinion about Beatriz's last words, tho. The only reason I would ever approach the sack of shit ever again it's to slit his damn throat - with my bare teeth if I have to. " If I get closer it's only to finish what was started. " I have absolutely no intentions to follow any of them and even less to help this little shit out. I regret nothing of what happened, pretty sure it is only something reported to later between us. Beatriz can't always be around both of us. I sure look menacing with the blood dripping down from my nose to my chin and my twisted elbow. Sexiest man on the island right now. Anyway, I am clearly not going to the infirmary and mom can insist for millenniums I will not step down from my position on the subject. She wants to help him first, then she can take care of him as much as she likes. I don't care. It's not the first time I see my brother being tended to first and I can get back to my own village to get some medical attention by a friend while I plot my revenge. " I am perfectly fine. I'm going back home. " Where neither of them live anymore. If I thought I managed to get over the fact Beatriz left the clan, it is now obvious the way she cares for my enemy doesn't fit anywhere into the things I can forgive. There's no point for me in staying here any longer if I can't finish this fight, so I do the only logical thing I can think of: I turn around and start to walk away while also trying not to move my injured arm.

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CODES © LITTLE WOLF.

a traitor is everyone who does not agree with me

noam && jonathan && beatriz

As I watch them stop their stupid fight, I can be relieved by the fact that I arrived just in time. I don’t really understand what pushed them to fight like this or why they hate each other so much, but now is not the time to think about all that. Whereas Noam stops and succeeds to calm himself, I cannot be sure that Jonathan will do the same. I can see that he’s still angry, but again, I don’t really have the luxury of time since they’re both so badly hurt. I can’t stop to care deeply about how he’s mad at me, again. It doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt me to see him angrily stare at me, simply that I don’t have the time to talk him out of his anger. I can hear his sigh while I take care of Noam and I have to restrain myself to blurt out my disappointment. If he wanted me to take care of him first, he should not have stabbed his brother in the first place. Anyways, I brace myself for the protest about my decision of taking them both to the infirmary. Noam is first disagreeing with the fact that I except them both to help each other get there. I glare at him to make him understand that I’m really serious about this. However I don’t have the time to give him a proper answer because Jonathan blurts out what is probably the stupidest thing I’ve heard today. I can only hope he isn’t serious, even though I’m pretty sure that he is. « You’re better not. » I daresay that my tone speaks for itself. Of course, I love Jonathan but as much as I love him, I’m not sure that I would be able to forgive him if he « finishes what he started ». I don’t want to be mad at him, but it’s pretty hard considering what happened and he’s not helping by deciding to go back to the Sigma camp. I let out a sigh before I go after him. « You’re not fine at all and I can’t let you go back there before a doctor takes a look at you. » And by doctor, I mean either Edan or Avery. I know that some of our friends can tend to him quite well but I don’t think that it’s enough. Coming closer, I grab his shirt and take it upon myself to convince him : « Please Jonathan ? I’m worried about your injuries. »It’s the truth even if I’m sure that he won’t accept that. I have to brace myself again, convinced that he will reject me totally. I can deal with that, I don’t want to but I also think I don’t have a choice. I then let him go, I can’t force him to come with me and help Noam get to the infirmary. It’ll pain me to see him go and to know that once again he’s angry at me, but if he’s stuck on the idea of going back I won’t have a choice. After all, even with some pressure, Noam will need medical attention soon. Going back to my other son, I offer him my hand and say : « Here, I’ll help you. » He can’t walk well so it’s better if I take some of his weight, since Jonathan doesn’t want to help.

A TRAITOR IS EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT AGREE WITH ME


noam & jonathan

Life is so unpredictable. Someday you wake up thinking you’re gonna talk to your sister on Skype when her flight lands, and a few hours later, you learn the plane crashed and she’s lost in the sea… that is if she’s not dead. Or you think you’re going to go get some meat for tonight’s dinner, and then you get attacked but a dumb white fucktard. And then finally, you were set on killing said fucktard and do a favor to the whole world, when you’re dear mom comes along and stops the fighting. I feel disappointed… in myself for letting this retarded asshole fuck with my mind and make me fight, and the in the situation. I mean, I don’t know if there is anything in this world I would like more than to see his smoll tiny body get drained of his blood slowly and painfully. I don’t mind going to infirmary to be honest. I do like Edan and he knows me well. I have a complete trust in his ability to treat the wound this selfish bastard inflicted me. True to the sick and self-centered psycho he is, Jonathan says out loud what we both think about getting close together before getting his drama queen façade on. Acting like the odd man, the reject, the poor poor boy who can’t get what he wants. I can’t help but snorting at this little game, and it sends a wave of pain in my side. I stifle a moan while Bea’ tries to appease the ”””””victim””””” act. She goes after him and I decide to start moving toward the infirmary, I may be tough, but I’m starting to lose my strength without the blinding rage and adrenaline flowing through my blood. I try to put the feet of my hurt leg on the floor, but stops it soon enough as the pain washes over me, black dots appearing before my eyes. It finally goes away, just at the moment Bea comes back, hand offered. I do not hesitate and take it, putting some, but not all of my weight on it. I soon realize I’m better with no putting any weight on my hurt leg, so I end up jumping up and down on the good one, using her help mostly so I don’t fall over. I start to sweat and I have to use everything to focus. I can’t help but hope the way to the infirmary is gonna be a short one, even if I know very well it won’t.

a traitor is everyone who does not agree with me
noam & jonathan

The desire to finish this fight so we can get over with it is strong. Unfortunately, Beatriz is doing her mom job, making sure the situation doesn't pursue its previous course. My walk is cut short, turning around since she's talking to me just to look at her face probably one last time for a long time. I can't agree with her words. I am fine, I will live through it, and she doesn't care about my minor injuries. Maybe I'm only nineteen, but I can handle myself quite well alone despite what everyone seems to believe. " Whatever you say, I'm not going to the damn infirmary. Take care of your precious little one. " There's no way I'm going to accept being the second choice ever again and if her priorities linger over Noam, then fine. She can go with him for all I care, I am heading my own way and I show it perfectly by removing her hand holding my shirt, using my good hand while staring straight into her eyes. Despite the fact I would have loved it if she had sided with me, I can't hope as much from her and it's okay. I don't need her at all cost in my life. Sooner or later, Beatriz will realize that I'm not the person she thinks I am anyway and I bet my ass she would find a way to ditch me when she finds the truth. Because this is how life works: friends come and go, nothing is ever set in stone. It was foolish from myself to let me be tricked into thinking I was somehow important for someone I didn't bring anything to. Let's be realist real quick here: Beatriz doesn't need me either. I'm a weight for Bea, making her kind of obligated to hand me meat since I don't know how to hunt since no one ever thought about the fact teaching me would have been a great idea. No. Let's just feed the kid to soothe our conscience. From the corner of my eyes, I notice Noam's bow that has been abandoned on the ground. The idea of breaking it on my way back brushes my mind, yet I'm stopped mentally by Beatriz's presence so I drop the plan. One last gaze at her is all I give before turning back and leaving in the opposite direction. Yep, I'm pissed.

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